Dr Abby's Problem Page

Resolve your ringing issues here!

Our resident newly qualified Dr Abby is here to answer any queries you have related to ringing, ringers and ringing etiquette. If she is unable to answer the question herself she will consult her team of experts. Click here to send an email to Dr Abby

Questions and Answers

Dear Dr Abby,
I recently rang in a very enjoyable quarter peal at my home tower. Well, I say enjoyable, but that is actually a lie. As I came to leave the church, much to my horror the service for which we were ringing had already started. No problem you say, just stand quietly until a hymn starts then leave, we did infact do this, however David Rog-... one of the ringers who shall remain anonymous was overwhelmed by the experience, and began frantically coughing. As you can imagine, this was rather a traumatic experience for all of us, as we were trying to wait in silence, to make an unnoticed exit. 10 minutes after us reaching the bottom of the stairs however we managed to leave the church without too much disruption.
Do you have any suggestions as to how we can get out of the church when a service has already begun..?

Mrs Dodges

Dear Mrs Dodges,

Perhaps next time you should don the same outfits as the choir. Clerical garb that blends into the background is an ideal and practical solution for the perfect great escape.

Dear Dr Abby
Do you think that coffee breaks are a good idea at a ringing practice? I have heard people say that they have come to ring, not to drink coffee. Also there must be all sorts of unwanted side effects surely? And what if you accidentally spilled some water over yourself?

Dear Madam,
Indeed accidental spillage is an issue - imagine the embarrassment of being all wet. Coffee breaks also introduce the potential for slurpage. Drinking stimulants at practice may well also have unwanted side effects - beer after is perhaps the way forward - a well earned beverage after some Exercise.

Dear Dr Abby,
Is there a district or guild 'lost and found' box? I've misplaced a t-shirt but can't for the life of me remember where it is...

Hi,

I suggest you scour the horizons of Suffolk - I believe that it is common to hoist lost items onto church flag poles. Incidentally, what do you wear when you take your t-shirt off, and how do you get changed with due modesty and consideration for the rest of the band?

Dear Dr Abby

We recently found a crumpled T shirt in a damp heap in the corner of our ringing room after a peal (rather a quick one too I might add) by a visiting band. Should we return it? Nobody wants to wash it and we don't know who it belongs to. It's pink as well, so we wouldn't want to just guess which member of the band would have worn such a thing, or indeed who was THAT sweaty. yuk

I suggest that you hoist it up on the flagpole for all to see, including the owner. I remember a similar tactic worked quite well once at a cub scout camp, although the article in question was some brown pyjama trousers. Your question reminds me of Hypercolour T-shirts - the ones that changed colour with heat. Did anyone ever wear those ringing?

Dear Dr Abby,

In view of the recent outbreak of ‘Swine Flu’ we’re taking extra precautions to ensure that none of us pass on the dreaded ailment. After many failed methods of preventing the contamination of ourselves, including putting the sallies in barbicide for 30minutes between ringing, wearing gloves (although, unfortunately the tenor ringer wore nylon gloves, and couldn’t stop ringing the lightning work from Bristol, even though we were ringing a half course of Yorkshire minor) and also burning the sallies a little between ringing, however every time this resulted in a fireout. Our latest idea is that we all purchase our own rope, and just bring that to the practice with us. However, as you can imagine this has one major flaw, it takes us about 20 minutes to change a rope. Do you have any advice as to how we can speed this up? We already have purchased our ropes though, so leaving the idea is not an option.

Thanks,

Inspired by an excellent response to an equally convoluted question given recently at her home tower, the Dr says: I haven't got a f*****g clue.

Dear Dr Abby,

Please could you give me some advice on how to tactfully mention a certain problem to a

fellow ringer without causing them any embarrassment, as the problem is caused by them.

Whilst ringing with them the other day they decided to consume a bowl of soup, a miraculous feat I know and not something that i've ever encountered before in all my years of ringing, although I now discover this happens regularly.

Whilst the soup was not the problem, as maybe they were hungry and needed some

sustenance, it was the way in which they consumed it as they slurped it off the spoon.

This is hardly good etiquette at the dining table let alone in the ringing chamber, and the

noise of which was rather off putting and I lost my place much to my annoyance.

What would you suggest I could do ?

C a'Leekie

Dear C'a Leekie,

Bad soup etiquette, particularly slurping, is intolerable in any circumstance. I suggest you initiate a discussion on table manners, or leave a copy of Mrs Beeton's excellent work somewhere prominent in the tower. It is, I believe, considered good manners to dip the far side of the spoon into the soup and consume from the side closest to one, particularly if one is eating from a communal cauldron of pottage.

Yours,

Dr A

Dear Dr Abby

I would like some advice on how to avoid wobbly knees when visiting churches in Suffolk on my bicycle.

Mandy

Dear Mandy,

I suggest that you get a tandem and sit on the back seat. That way, the person in front can do the work and your knees will be fine.

Yours,

Dr A.